My Tickets Have Seats on Them for a Reason

I’ve reached the point of exhaustion when it comes to funny and/or interesting stories. I have nothing left to give you, blog reading community. I thought I’d always be able to pump out a post every other day, and here I am with almost nothing to write.

 I thought if I started off like this, I’d be able to come up with something as I write. I always tell my students to just start writing and eventually they’d have something in the mess the spewed on their Word document. It usually works, so I’m going to take my own advice.

I’ve always felt like my strength as a blog writer is telling funny stories or coming up with asinine gripes. The problem is that very little changes in my life. I’m a man who follows a routine. Routine is good, m’kay? I guess I should write about recent events in my life that haven’t been the routine. Well, here goes nothing. My wife and I went to the Arcade Fire concert last week. As far as I know, they haven’t played in Houston since they first started, so it was a big deal because they are one of my favorite bands.

Fun fact: the lead singer actually spent some of his youth in The Woodlands, TX, which is a suburb of Houston.

The show surpassed my expectations. About 3 songs into the show, my wife, the little scamp she is and eyeing the empty seats 4 rows in front of us, wanted to move up. This became one of those moments when I realized I’m getting old. I dug my metaphorical heals into ground and refused to move, like a dog who doesn’t want to take a piss in the rain (sorry, it’s raining and Earl won’t take a piss outside). I felt old and, dare I say, too mature to step over those seats in front of us. I am NOT a high school kid! No, we’ll stay the course back here, I thought. When those people get to their seats, my wife will thank me for saving her the embarrassment of having to crawl back over the seats to our own. Yes, women love men who refuse to take chances. Here’s an idea for a romance novel: woman is kept against her will in a tower by a medieval baron, and the strapping, lovelorn goat herder continues herding goats. “They make towers for a reason, damn it!” I think that’ll get the women swooning.

Eventually, after much debate and inner turmoil, we moved up, and the last 3 songs were just fantastic. This was my sky diving, my running with the bulls, my swimming with the sharks. My wife, obviously impressed with my aplomb, asked me to kill a spider that night.

 I met that challenge.