I just finished sorting, folding, and putting away our laundry, and while I mentally zoned out doing this, I couldn’t help but think about all of the clothing options my wife has for work. Oh, how I envy her. She can wear skirts, dresses, pants, and even short pants like Capri pants and culottes. Well, probably not those but she has stuff. I’ve seen it!
I have four pairs of chinos from Banana Republic that I just bought because of the seat splitting epidemic that’s been going on with me. I have khaki, dark khaki, light green, and black. That might as well read: Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday. Luckily, I can wear jeans on Fridays and thank God for that because my Friday pair’s mending thread is holding on for dear life. They look like a bunch of tiny rickety bridges from The Temple of Doom just daring to be tested.
Regardless of having to buy new clothes, I wish I had more options. Every day, it’s just chinos and a button up shirt. I think some macho men designers (oxymoron?) need to come up with some new clothes for men to wear. I don’t mean completely new; I’m sure everything has been tried, but at least, bring back some old styles that would work. We also need someone tough and rugged to wear them so other men will think its okay. Where’s John Wayne when you need him? Sorry, Tom Cruise.
The idea that flashes in my head like a neon sign would be to bring back robes – robes of all kinds. Men could wear robes for all occasions. Going to a fancy dinner? Judicial robes. High school wanting to look different than the man? Graduation robes. Cult? Religious robes. Going to play a little Dungeons and Dragons with the crew? Wizard robe. I can’t even imagine how comfortable this would be! Also, no more embarrassing split pants. I can see it right now: get home from a long day’s work, unzip the old wizard robe and relax in the tighty whities with a cold beer. Xanadu. Xan-a-du.
P.S. Whoever is reading my blog from Europe, give me shout out on the comment section! I just finished teaching Beowulf to my students, so… you know… go Danes and Geats!
Now I know exactly what to get you for Christmas! Tighty whites and a robe. Done and done.
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